You Wouldn't Believe It

I can hardly believe what has happened in the last 10 days.  But I'll do my best to relate all the feelings and goings-on with our family.  Last Monday (August 3rd), David got a call from the school district he student taught with in Utah.  They had an opening at a middle school and he was highly recommended to the principal there.  To be honest, I started crying right then because we had only been in Mesquite about 3 weeks and it was a much better job fit for David, I really wished that call would've came a month earlier!  Well, David hadn't signed his contract in Mesquite, and we thought it couldn't hurt to go to Utah to talk to the principal, especially since we were headed that way anyways.  Once we got to the middle school, it was apparent almost immediately that this job was going to be so much better than the one in Mesquite, so after a lot of discussion, David accepted the job!  It's at Joel P. Jensen Middle School in West Jordan.  He'll be teaching band, choir, and orchestra.  We also spent a lot of time looking at apartments and quickly realized that housing in the Salt Lake area is much more expensive than anywhere else we've lived.  And it was brought to our attention that buying a house/condo/residence is actually cheaper than renting.  So we're also looking to buy!  In the mean-time, David's brother has offered to let us stay with them until we finish that whole process, which is very generous.  On Tuesday, August 11, we came back to Mesquite to try and pack up our essentials because we have to be back in Utah on Friday, the 14th, to meet with people and then David starts work on Monday, August 17th!  Oh yeah, and somewhere in there we had 2 birthday parties for Asher (which I will do another post with a lot of cute pictures!). 

So, to say the least, we are both at our wits end trying to get our life together.  I usually hit a "wall" when it comes to packing.  The faster we have to move, the earlier I hit it because all the stress really takes its toll.  Today, I hit it hard.  I couldn't move, I couldn't think, I really just shut down.  David was really great in helping me through it, but all this stress really won't go away until we're at least a little bit settled down.  I'm starting to worry about the toll it's taking on Asher.  I've noticed he's getting a lot more clingy to David and I.  It's almost like if we're not in the room he's worried he's been abandoned.  I hope every day that he won't remember all this.  I know children are very resilient, but I still feel bad.  But I do think the job in Utah will be much more permanent than our lives so far. 

Ever since I was in college I was in the habit of trying to figure out why I was put in whatever situation I was in.  I try to see God's purpose for me and what was accomplished by my being there.  I've been thinking about that a lot lately.  Why did we have to go to Kayenta?  Why couldn't this job offer come a month ago before we moved to Mesquite?  Was it for us, or for someone else's benefit?  Moving to Kayenta, it didn't take long for me to realize why we were there.  The first week at church I had multiple people come up to me saying that they were praying for someone who could play piano and lead music would come to the ward.  The Primary President was also the Sacrament meeting pianist and she led and played the piano in Primary for singing time.  And when we moved in she was about 6 months pregnant and was very worried about what would happen when she had her baby.  I came just in time to help relieve her stress about that and take over until she had her baby and until a missionary could come into the ward who could play piano.  It was very hard for our family, but in the end I was glad I could help serve.  Also, we were able to save a lot of money and get caught up on a lot of bills that had stacked up while David was doing his student teaching.

While in Mesquite, I think I have learned to try and make friends more easily.  We were only in the ward about 3 weeks, but I already made a couple of friends (which, if you knew me, you would realize what a miracle that is because of how reserved and introverted I am).  Also, last week while I was in nursery with Asher (he refuses to go alone-another thing that has me a little concerned), a mother dropped her daughter off because this daughter was another child who had apprehensions about nursery, and out of everyone in the room, I was the only one that could console her and keep her happy while her mom went to Relief Society.  The nursery leader thanked me and all I could think was "I know how it feels to have a kid that has a hard time with this".  Maybe there was something else I was supposed to learn here, but I know that when I get to go to Relief Society and just enjoy sitting there listening to the lesson, it is extremely rejuvenating, and I wanted to let someone else have that opportunity!

In both Mesquite and Kayenta, I have become accustomed to being a minority (in Kayenta it was 95% Native American, and in Mesquite at our apartment complex it is mostly Hispanic).  That's let me see a different perspective and, I think, helped me grow to be a more compassionate person.  I know throughout all our different moves, we have learned to be humble.  And we get to see the good in other people through their kindness towards us.  We wouldn't have made it if it wasn't for the kindness of families, ward members, and blessings from our Heavenly Father.  It's helped me appreciate what I have and makes me want to pass that kindness on to other people.

I don't know what living in Utah will bring, but I've learned that I just have to trust that things will work out.  That as long as we're doing what's right, we'll be ok.  This past year has been so hard.  I've hit many lows and wanted to give up.  But I didn't, and I'm very proud of myself for that!  Hopefully, from here on out, our general direction will be up!  After all, we made it this far, right?